Hmm

I'm a little worried about myself right now. As of today, I've been dating the bf for 2 weeks. that's it. Two frikin weeks. it feels like forever!

I'm like...addicted to him, it's weird. I feel awful if I know I have to go a whole day without seeing him. It's like life suddenly doesn't have a purpose anymore. I have no inspiration to write or for my artwork...I just don't want to do anything. Just because i didn't get to see him. How dumb is that?

I mean...if i was head over heels in love with the guy and we'd been dating for a year then i would understand. Actually...maybe not even then. By then you'd be used to going a few days apart I bet...

But after two weeks? isn't that just...ridiculous?

And that begs another question...when is it alright to admit that you love someone?

Maybe when the idea of them being unhappy makes you unhappy...and you want to do nothing except make them happy again. Is is when the idea of something happening to them makes you want to burst into tears? Or the idea of them leaving you is enough to stop your heart for a few minutes? Or is it just when...you don't want to leave each other's side at all. because it seems impossible to be as happy without them as you are with them near. Even if you're not doing anything...

Am i falling in love? For sure. He makes it so easy...I dunno if I'm there yet...and when I know for sure, when is it alright to let him know that? neither of us even joke about it. "I love you dearly, but you're evil." type thing. It's like...we're scared to even mention it. The L word.

I'm in lesbians with you.

hehehe, kudos to anyone who got that. though i admit, i wasn't a fan of the movie myself...

Anyways, it's like...we're just trying to not think about a future. Normally with guys i start daydreaming about what kinds of things could happen...maybe him asking me on a trip or proposing...the honeymoon. never the wedding, that's work and I'm not looking forward to the stress of it all, lol. But with him? i don't. Ever. The biggest event possibly in my future with him is our trip to disney world next spring, lol. And that might just be a joke =P No...right now, the biggest thing I know is coming up is going to his house when they move into the new place. That's it.

I admit though...he's planning on moving out next spring. As am I. A teensy part of me is wondering...if we're still together, what if we moved in together?

Gah, I dunno!! All i know is that i won't be able to see him much at all this week or this weekend, and I'm super sad about it...

~Emmy